Seasoning a Cast Iron Life
At First a Source of Pride, How We Are, Peeling Back the Paint, & The Skin We’re In.
At First a Source of Pride.
‘You don’t know me’ is a running phrase said jokingly in my circle, alluding to those early years and how much they impact how we are.
I’ve had a you don’t know me attitude until recently in my very late 30s. I likely still do, but Ch’you don’t-know me.
—
For a lot of us, our first 10-15 years of life define the rest of our entire life.
From 0-3 years, 3-5 years, 6-9 years, 9-12 years, all the way up to 15 or 16 years old, when that chip is firmly set on our shoulders.
“Get ready future”.
—
A Cast Iron Life.
When using a cast iron pan to cook, you want to season it over time, again and again, adding layers of oil to protect the pan and make it non-stick, perfect to cook.
Every year we add layers of seasoning to our cast ironed life through loss, gain, success, challenges, failure, change, joy, anger, and pain. All of it.
Perfect to cook.
—
How We Are.
I visited my Instagram to DM a cousin and scrolled through my posts throughout the years. After a little bit of time since being away from May 2020, I could physically feel what it was doing to my brain.
And it was not healthy.
—
A flood of memories in my IG. Images of places, people and comments. Sprinkles here and there, all built far above the early invisible layers nobody sees.
99.99% of the people we interact with will only get so deep. For most of us, anyways.
They’ll never have an opportunity to understand. Often we haven’t understood it ourselves. Instead the world only sees a reflection of how we are as a result.
—
Our layers define us greatly. I saw this interview with Masai yesterday showing his layers, saying of someone ‘your success is my success’.
The heart of Masai’s layers is deep. We’re given an opportunity to see it through the context of these publicly shared events.
—
Onions have hearts and layers you peel back too.
Onions make you cry.
I’m not crying you’re crying.
We’re onions, not potatoes.
This isn’t a Haiku.
<3
—
Peeling Back the Paint.
Like an old house with layers of paint on its walls, if you peel away at it, especially on door frames, you can peel the layers down to the original.
It’s so satisfying to peel paint, isn’t it?
Life’s paint? Not so much.
Some layers are stuck together, some we don’t want to peel back, and with each layer, it’s harder to peel. Some we don’t dare to peel back because it’s hard to confront some cold hard truths.
Like Oprah’s book ‘What Happened to You?’.
Everyone just sees the latest layer of paint every year and creates their own picture of us and our life.
—
The Skin We’re In.
Some layers are fully visible to everyone no matter what.
Literally the skin we’re in, our sex, gender, and the names we carry.
And where we come from.
And the world sure does like to season us.
With love and solidarity,
Mustefa
—
Stay Strong 2024.